When Thank You isn't enough

" Thank You " just two small words that we say many times a day. We're taught to say them at an early age, to be polite when we receive something or if someone does something for us. The words work well in every day terms. 

What if someone saved your child's life or your life ? "Thank You" the words seem too small now, not enough to show your gratitude. Yet what's the alternative ? Lets narrow this down to a specific. Donor Families, how do you ever make them realise how much their selfless act means to you, your family , your friends ? For most recipient families I guess you don't , you may choose to write a card to the donor family but you'll never receive a reply . You'll never know if they are comforted that someone is alive because of their loved one. 

I know I felt such guilt that I kept my child against the odds after some virus tried it's hardest to destroy her heart. The other family weren't so lucky meningitis took their child from them. Yet when their World came crashing down and they felt the worse pain possible they thought of organ donation. Incredible isn't it, that a human struck down by tragedy thought of saving another family from going through the same . How do you write to them ? What do you say ? Big words are needed to show your gratitude but we only have those two small ones "Thank You"  to express ourselves with. I know I wanted to write something amazing , something that gave meaning to what I felt inside but words didn't flow. I cried blotting my writing in the note card I'd carefully chosen. I have no recollection regarding what I wrote, no idea at all .Further letters followed after this first one, more updates, photographs  and words of thanks as my daughter continued to thrive and grow. Those letters were appreciated, kept and reread. In fact they were read again this week. My letters now belong to another mother, they are treasured and kept with her baby daughters things in a memory box. I'm so glad I got to write them and I'm glad they helped in a tiny way to ease the pain. So perhaps "Thank You" did help.

                       

      I'm lucky after 9 years I received a letter back from R, a few more have followed since. For me it was so important that they had other children , the letters confirmed they did. Since then after we both followed the same Twitter Account in November we email regularly sometimes 3-4 times a day . Often we think of something and the other one pings an email, this happens frequently and is quite spooky . We share so much now, I can say "Thank You" whenever I want to , it no longer seems quite as small. I know how much she cares about Eloise and she thanks me for sharing all the ups and downs with her. I've been honest with her regarding post transplant life, I'd hate her to feel bereaved all over again if anything happened to Eloise. 

       

    So "Thank You" R for 11 incredible extra years you have given me with Eloise so far. We will continue to look after the gift of life you gave us. Always making sure Eloise lives life enough for two. "Thank You" for sparing me from the pain of losing a child. "Thank You" for being there for me back then and recently during Eloise's blips. " Thank You" for being my friend, a friendship against the odds, brought together by two gorgeous girls . Xxx